Ah, that time of year when we have the opportunity to wipe the slate clear in our minds. The word resolution; the idea that we can resolve all that we have not yet resolved. By the meeting of hands on a clock face, all will be neatly tied up!
I have been thinking recently about our idea of life as a journey: that we are all trying to get somewhere and fulfill a checklist of experiences in order to qualify for the next round. But what if time and our experience is not in fact linear? Rather, what if it is all here, right now? All that we have done, all that we will ever do, and our potential and actuality is all moulded into us: our body, a museum of misgivings and highlights possibly stored with us for the journey.
I am an advocate of the work – in that, we need to try and shed the extra onion skins we’ve picked up along the way. It’s important that we see where we are distracted by our mind and understand how we can find equanimity within the vibration left by past experiences. We can then come to understand that all we have is what we have, right now: this energetic parcel. Yes, the past has left imprints. But they should be lessons: reminders rather than repeated conditioned reactions. We can’t change the past; we can only attempt to get rid of the imprint, while being grateful that it has brought us where we are today.
Everything we will ever know is already within us. We each have a story to tell, to ourselves or the world. When I was younger and studying art, I took two courses with one professor. Both courses, although called different things, were about the same thing. He had written various books, all on this same topic. I realised then that we each have a thesis within us – it is like a strand that we have always known to be of interest, something we want to explore, investigate and perhaps share.
Know that this strand is within you, and that you know everything you are ever going to know, it is just about discovering a clear pathway to it. It, I believe also, is the will of God.
So get to know that thing in you, clear your channels, have confidence in yourself, and let the course of revelation be an exciting one. Don’t compare yourself with others! Their thesis is definitely going to be different from yours, so you’re not racing against anyone! Most of all, have faith.
So yes, may we keep going, keep attuning to our hearts, each day seeing if we can come to know a stillness that resides constantly behind everything, that is where our faith can rest, for it is a constant support.
I think often also of the line in the Lord’s Prayer, Thy will be done, for it is not my will but Thy will. The will of God. All our human pushing and striving, is just us trying to bend the will of God. And what happens when we bend something – either it springs back to its natural state, or it breaks. Things don’t need to be pushed. They should just be.
One of my teachers said to me recently: ‘Selina, you and me both know that the only thing that really makes us spiritual, is our ability to go with the flow.’
Is this the resolution we are all therefore looking for? To renege our perfunctory idea of control and just go with the flow.
As the prayer from the Isha Upanishad goes:
This is perfect, that is perfect, take perfect from perfect and perfect alone remains, may peace and peace and peace be everywhere.
So in the end, there is nothing to resolve. Everything is already resolved. We just need a clear lens and pathway. So spend time with yourself, getting rid of the onion skins that might slip you up. But keep your eyes and heart open so you can continue to hear the music and do the dance. This is surely why we’re here.
By Selina Van Orden